October 19, 2009. No mercy for today's headlines from Reuters. I'm looking at you, Seregon O`Dassey.

This is National Teen Driver Safety Week and supermodel
BalloonBoy arrests coming soon. Surprising absolutely no one,charges are coming very soon againstthe Balloon Boy family for stagingthe whole sad drama for publicity.
DanteWesley deserves a long suspension for knocking out CliftonSmith well before he fielded a punt. As cheap as it gets.
A SriLankan billionaire (Who knew such a thing existed?) arrestedin the U.S. may have been funding the Tamil Tigers rebellion.
Obamaunveils a new Sudan strategy. Two things: I didn't know wehad an existing Sudan strategy and secondly, don't we have moreimportant things do? Unemployment. Health care. Afghanistan. Sudandoes not make the cut.
AMicrosoft store is coming to a mall near you. Taking a pagefor Apple, Microsoft is poised to open it's first retail inScottsdale, Arizona any day now. Smart move.
Threepeople died during the Detroit Marathon. No, they didn't getshot. Thoughts and prayers to their families.
Hallow`s End is here. Time to party like you`ve just broken free from the Scourge.
LeBron thought he had cancer last January.

And finally, Seregon O`Dassey says she is a real-life Vampyre. (Note: My first thought was you can't even spell Vampire, but she spells it with a `Y`. Um, OK.) Whatever. She also has a 24-inch waist and D cup breasts so I`m willing to risk a bite or two. She has also been naked in Playboy. (P.S. We don't post nudes so Google it!)
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